Why men date other marrieds?
Chat about a loaded theme that no one wants to talk about, this is it. Funny thing, married dating have been going on from ancient times. Extramarital affairs can be filled with evils, cause heartache, and other troubles. Also you must wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness thing, finances, age difference, spiritual education, shame, and on and on. I expect there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe years long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, adult dating for merried.
Why do men have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are seeking extramarital affairs. I think mainly though it is only the human condition, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
Biologically we as human beings are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us get away the real world for a brief period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Somebody are able to switch the wish on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another human being, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos society has erected against extra-marital affairs. For many individuals the yearnings will overcome their fears and make them risk the fury of not only their relatives, but the public as well. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is extremely good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not wound your spouse or anyone else? You would need to reduce the risk you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the largest group, enormous actually. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they feel comfy in the manner they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to look after. Your assets are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their spouse. An marital affair from time to time solves the trouble while keeping the marriage whole.
Ignoring, sorrowfully this is a regular groung I fear. One or the other, as a rule the guy is sexually neglecting his spouse for a number of reasons. As a male I actually am thankful to you guys neglecting your girls and making them available to us males of romance, making them “milfs” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Maybe its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is gone, maybe it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Maybe we have just developed apart, our ordinary concerns diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is opposed to of what you want. Could be I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The major reason people give is, they search for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for economic gain, for retribution and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair